Thursday, June 11, 2015

Dating-Dating Girl in USA

Need dating advice? topbeautyful brings you online dating advice, tips, and insights from our dating and relationship experts. See the newest dating articles now
1. Dating Because not-married doesn't mean all alone.
If you're married, it's generally assumed you'll always have somebody -- for better or worse. But I'd just like to say that when you're not married,
you'll also always have somebody for better or worse, somebody to count on, love, laugh with, fight with, miss, confide in and rely on. Because being not-married doesn't mean you're alone. It means you're living your life with friends, lovers, sisters, brothers, neighbors and co-workers. You're just not living with a spouse. Maybe you're dating. Maybe you're in a relationship for two years, then in another for five years. Maybe you're like me: in a relationship for a decade and aiming for life. Maybe you opt for no romantic partner at all. Instead you connect with friends over big pots of soup and crusty bread, go on road trips and encounter strangers, work for social causes, swim in the ocean, play the violin in an amateur string quartet. You don't need to be married to have all the things marriage is supposed to give you -- a life rich with experience and intimacy.
2. Because love is a mystery… Dating
And marriage, by definition, is a contract, plain and simple. I neither want nor need my love defined in business or legal terms. The beauty of love is that it's undefined to begin with -- and always changing.
3. Because real security comes from being known for who you are and cared for no matter what.
Upsetting stuff in life happens, and marriage doesn't stop it. Security, on the other hand, makes those rough times endurable. I get mine from my children, every time they crack me up by serenading our mutt with their improvised blues songs. I get it from my partner, every time he reads my mind and knows I'm craving a late-night snack of kettle-cooked potato chips -- and then whips out a package he just happened to buy on his way home from work. I get it from my best friend, every time she senses I'm burnt out and takes me kayaking or mails me a poem. Feeling known and adored by the people around you -- be they lovers or co-workers or chums -- provides the greatest security of all. And you don't need a spouse to rely on it.
4. Because you can still have the ring.
When one of my friends turned 40, she registered for a bunch of household items and threw herself an unbridal shower. At first, I thought this seemed weird and kind of selfish, but then it hit me: I'd never begrudged my betrothed friends their waffle irons, blenders and cute, little sugar spoons. Why should I want any less for my unmarried friends? For that matter, why not want these things for myself? Not housewares, exactly, but those aspects of marriage rituals--be they weddings or anniversaries--that do resonate with me. Because it turned out, after my boyfriend and I had been together five years, I found myself yearning for something surprisingly traditional: a tangible symbol of our connection, something I could have with me at all times, something I could touch. I shyly announced I'd like a ring, and he went out and found me a beauty. It looks like fairies made it from twigs and moonlight: tiny and bumpy with little specks that wink in the sun.
5. Because you can break up.
My boyfriend and I have been together 10 years now, and whenever we've hit an especially rocky patch (as all couples do) it's been a relief to know there's nothing holding us together except our desire to make it work. We're at liberty to break up in an instant if things become unbearable. What sweet, paradoxically empowering knowledge this is! During our saddest, ugliest, most hopeless moments, I have taken comfort in this fact, which has given me the willingness to re-dedicate myself to us.
6. Because you can always get married next year. Or the next. Or the year after that.
I'm no anti-marriage crusader. And this isn't an injunction; it's just a list. I was married once, and the truth is, my boyfriend and I haven't ruled out getting married someday. We're not sure what might prompt us to desire legal accreditation, but we remain open to the possibility. In a way, that's the whole point: remaining open. Both in our attitude toward marriage and in our relationship itself; we hope to stay open, to be continually receptive to ideas, to thoughts, to feelings, to experiences, to others and to ourselves. It doesn't matter whether you're in a long-term relationship, grieving the end of one, just starting a new romance or contentedly flying solo: None of us knows what the future will hold. And so we let ourselves move forward into it, clear-eyed about the limits of our certainty and invigorated by the adventure.
After a long drought, it’s tempting to think it will never rain again. Here’s why you should keep looking up.
People who are single, but don’t want to be, find it easy to grasp Einstein’s Theory of Relativity. He once said, “Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That’s relativity.”
Anyone wanting to spend time with a pretty girl or a handsome man, but instead has endured years of fruitless searching, has no trouble picturing the “hand-on-a-hot-stove” analogy. The prospect of another day alone can feel as if time has stopped entirely—and that love will never arrive.
“Never” is an infectious word, like a flu virus. Once you’ve caught it, everything loses its luster. Exhaustion and depression become lead weights strapped to your feet. All you want to do is stay in bed and pull the covers over your head.
As justifiable as this state of mind may be (the stove really is hot, after all), it’s not very useful. Because unlike the real flu, this one won’t go away on its own.
Fortunately, there is a cure. Just as your condition began as an idea—that true love is a rare creature you are likely to never see—it can end with one as well. Here it is: Love is always closer than you think. That’s not another empty greeting card slogan. It is the truth. Love is always nearby, even when all appearance argues against it.
The romantic comedy “Love Actually” begins with a montage of touching scenes filmed at London’s Heathrow airport. One after another, people come through the arrivals gate and are greeted by someone they love. They embrace and kiss. They cry, they laugh. Hugh Grant narrates the imagery:
“Love is everywhere. Often it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there: fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends … If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaking suspicion that love actually is all around.”
When you are resolved to resist words like “hopeless” and “never,” you will see evidence of love everywhere you go. You’ll stop visualizing vast distances between you and the love of your life. Rather, you’ll imagine that he or she is just around the corner. You’ll recognize the love you see between a small child and her grandfather at the park, or best friends huddled for hours over coffee. It is a ubiquitous current that never ceases to flow—and that is presently carrying you and your partner toward each other.
Love is always closer than you think. Write these words on sticky notes and wallpaper your world with them. Put them on your bathroom mirror, in your car, beside your bed, on the inside of your front door, so it’s the last thing you see before you go out. It will help make the hours of waiting for romance seem like minutes instead.

Total Pageviews